Love Aaj Kal

A rant formatted as a review on an annoying movie.

Love Aaj Kal is an irritating movie. The first half (of the two-act format of most Bollywood movies) of the movie is intended as a mishmash of events to confuse the audience to get them thinking. The second half was possibly intended to disentangle the scenes, peel them off layer by layer and decipher the movie into a lovely love story that makes you follow your heart to the person you’ve always meant to be with.

Unfortunately, Imtiaz Ali gets ahead of himself. What I think happened is, he forgot how to disentangle. He ended up in a mess. He tried harder, and ended up with a marriage knot. Eventually, he cut his way through it all and cell-o-taped it to a quick fix. Oh, what a mess.

Saif Ali Khan is usually likeable, but he is irritating here. The guy doesn’t shut-up! If only he shut up and let some of the other characters speak, the movie would not have needed to go through the mess it does. Midway through the second-half, you feel like climbing up there and giving him a tight slap. Even the songs are a mess, especially “Twist”, which starts like a Brazilian Carnival with an Indian theme in the middle of London.

The leads’ families are as distant from them as in Western movies – they live an independent life that just seems so disjointed from reality that you wonder if Indians are already Americanized, or Bollywood just can’t seem to get over their fascination with the Western concept of “growing out of your parents’ house”.

Also, I have a feeling that Rahul Khanna is a born loser. I wish it was Akshaye Khanna in his place. There we’d have an interesting story of him hunting down his partner’s ex-lover, or simply just killing her and getting over with. That would be nice.

Saif Ali Khan is now pushing 40. Isn’t it high time he stop playing a 28-year old? It’s sad really. Ranbir Kapoor or Shahid Kapoor should play these roles. Saif should really really get over his Hum Tum / Salaam|Namaste / Kal Ho Na Ho / Ta Ra Rum Pum roles – basically multiple versions of his own Dil Chahta Hai role.

Also, isn’t it time that Bollywood gets over its obsession with Punjab? If 10 movies need to show some ethnicity, 9 of them show Punjab. From a country of 8 major religions and 28 states (+7 Union Territories), that’s some imbalance. Really, for a change, show us Assamese. Take us to Orissa or Nagaland or Manipur. Atleast to Gujrat? Don’t get me wrong, I love Punjabi culture too, and one of my closest friends is Punjabi. But overkill hai yaar!

[deeeeeeeeep breath]

Ok, now let’s wait for Kaminey.

Rating: ★½☆☆☆

About Shariq Madani

Shariq is a social, talkative, fun-loving guy who enjoys books, food and a long drive. But his real joy is in the comfortable darkness of a cinema, watching a good movie, and later spending hours discussing it.